I woke up this morning knowing full well that it’s resurrection Sunday and still…I had to force myself out of bed to think about going to church.
I feel no need to explain myself or try to reason with why I haven’t gone: I just haven’t. What I have done, is spend more time with my family and more time by myself. But today, I had to will myself out of bed.
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I went to a formal last night, so you better believe that I had hair spray still in my hair, that my feet hurt, and that I had far too little sleep last night. But I showed up. I showed up in my nice little coral sweater, some comfy jeans, and knew that Jesus wouldn’t care that my hair was dirty and that I’d rolled out of bed not 30 minutes prior.
I showed up.
I’m a firm believer that God also has a sense of humor — I mean, it IS April Fool’s Day today too, right?
About a month ago or so, I had a very strange interaction in class — let me set the scene.
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I’m taking Earth Science as my last general education course. The people are generally what fuel this course, not the content. I’m having a decent enough time, and Mondays are lab days, so we are ALWAYS out early. My kind of class for sure.
I sit at a table near the front of the room (NERD ALERT) and have a pretty good relationship with my lab partner — his name is Connor and he’s awesome. He makes me laugh, shake my head, and it’s generally a pretty good time. I sit next to another girl, name is unimportant. She is pretty headstrong, can be quite pleasant, but despises science with a burning passion. As you might imagine, her pleasant disposition can turn quite sour in the face of large amounts of science.
This particular lab had a lot of equations and math, which for me, meant that I was STOKED. I understand that most people do not enjoy that subject matter, including the student who sits next to me. She was becoming increasingly frustrated, furiously erasing her paper, slamming her pencil, and clearly not having it anymore. I thought that she could use some assistance, so I offered to help.
Boy, was I wrong.
You know in a spy movie when things start going downhill or the plane starts to nose dive and all you can yell is, “ABORT. ABORT,” and you furiously try to scamper away unscathed? Yeah, that was me.
She FLIPPED. Straight up cussed me out, yelling, being extremely abrasive, sitting no more than 6” to my right.
I was baffled, apologized for trying to help, and locked eyes with my instructor as if to say, “HELP ME.”
He dismissed her from the class to cool off and I sat there in her absence, very perplexed. Was this an instance where helping hurts? Was I out of line? I truly just wanted to make it easier. I stewed in that question for a few minutes and she returned to class. She gingerly sat back down next to me and apologized for her outburst.
I forgave her, we talked it out, and then I proceeded to help her through the rest of her assignment.
Yo, God. Thanks for the grace…for real.
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Fast forward to today as I sat in church. I took my usual space near the center, just me and myself, and guess who showed up?
Miss Thang herself.
And I thought, okay God. I see you. I get it. And this is pretty funny.
She ended up sitting next to me, we chatted about our last exam, shared notes on the sermon as it was happening, and she determined that the Tigers were ROBBED yesterday. (yo chicky, the grave was robbed today 😉 )
It wasn’t a terribly deep moment laced with the intricacies of life, but it was humanizing. Her outburst a month ago could’ve come from a place of frustration and fear. As I am in a season where overwhelmed is the new normal for so many, this allows me a space and opportunity to offer a little bit more grace than is sometimes given.
She is by no means a bad person. She’s really pleasant and quirky and knows a ton about the things that she loves. She just had a bad day. She is HUMAN.
Isn’t it awesome that we worship a God that sent His only Son to offer us a comeback story? To provide us grace and forgiveness so that we could provide the same to others? To not have to understand the large picture to enjoy the small moment?
Today, that small moment in the classroom came full circle in understanding the larger picture of Christ in my life.
I don’t always feel that church is the place to experience Christ’s love. Christ’s love and sacrifice are in the ordinary, everyday moments where we can choose to extend the grace that was so freely given to us. So, if I don’t make it back to church this semester…and who knows, I’m just taking it week by week, you best believe that I’ll be offering a bit more patience, humility, and grace as the next few weeks unfold.
Sometimes we need that swift little kick in the booty to reset our expectations and come at life from a different perspective.
Thanks, Jesus. I super needed that today.